letter to my dear husband

My Dear husband missing u every second... pain is back in full swing.... started when i told you around 8....i don't knw how to deal with myself.... when u are with me i feel the happiest luckiest proudest breathing creature alive nothing happens to me i stay in a state of euphoria but...moment my ecosystem gets an indication that am to be detached from your support line,..... all kinds of pain rush from all corners...BODY MIND SOUL DENIES TO CONTINUE WITH ME...I FEEL AT A LOSS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO DEAL WITH MYSELF.. AM THE BUGGEST PROBLEM TO ME!!!!!HATE U AS MUCH I LOVE YOU N MISS YOU EVEN MORE....EACH OF MY CELLS BETRAY TO STAY WITH ME WHEN THEY KNOW THEY STAY HAPPIER WITH YOU EOSIN....