I Miss My Husband
Tonight like every other night I would miss my husband.
I’m here blogging instead of going to bed. I don’t want to face the thought of slipping underneath the covers without him there to hold me.
I ache to talk to him for longer than a few minutes here or there. I want to share the details of my day or whatever it is with him, and love him till he can’t take it any longer cook for him and feed him and clean the kitchen with him and doze off in his arms helplessly tired and satiated..
It’s been times I don’t know since my ‘last day’ with him and that is encouraging in some ways… That’s somehow I have managed to spend these grotesque days and weeks which I don’t want to look back. We don’t have to do again. But even beyond this there are still so countless more days left to cover…and with hardly any rays of hope left anymore..
We tend to stay busy, and I have immersed myself in looking forward to the minutest things. ..I don’t even have any job at hand to keep me occupied..
I’ve gotten myself involved in so many things mundane but get going things of to continue bare minimum sustenence, set some goals, and done all the things I’m supposed to do to make the time go faster. To make myself forget that I miss him in my life. But what did I achieve a void emptiness always teasing me from the backdrop?
But I do still miss him. I still want his hand to hold. I still want his eyes to look into. I still want to fall into his hug at the end of the day. I still w ant to hang around his shoulders and give him a light kiss there just to make him I am there right beside him and he can’t take his mind off from me even if he is trying to forget me for a single second.
I want to share the laughing with him. I want to cry on his shoulder. I want to see him light up with delight at the joy of me changed to a night dress and putting cream on my face and arms and he is impatiently waiting for me in bed..I want to see the pride in his eyes which our babies bring him, and I want to share a little of the weariness and frustration that come along with the job of parenting too.
I want him. Plain and simple.
I don’t want to have to wait another second longer. But I will. Because its only a soulful waiting is how I love him right now.
Tonight like every other night I would miss my husband.
I’m here blogging instead of going to bed. I don’t want to face the thought of slipping underneath the covers without him there to hold me.
I ache to talk to him for longer than a few minutes here or there. I want to share the details of my day or whatever it is with him, and love him till he can’t take it any longer cook for him and feed him and clean the kitchen with him and doze off in his arms helplessly tired and satiated..
It’s been times I don’t know since my ‘last day’ with him and that is encouraging in some ways… That’s somehow I have managed to spend these grotesque days and weeks which I don’t want to look back. We don’t have to do again. But even beyond this there are still so countless more days left to cover…and with hardly any rays of hope left anymore..
We tend to stay busy, and I have immersed myself in looking forward to the minutest things. ..I don’t even have any job at hand to keep me occupied..
I’ve gotten myself involved in so many things mundane but get going things of to continue bare minimum sustenence, set some goals, and done all the things I’m supposed to do to make the time go faster. To make myself forget that I miss him in my life. But what did I achieve a void emptiness always teasing me from the backdrop?
But I do still miss him. I still want his hand to hold. I still want his eyes to look into. I still want to fall into his hug at the end of the day. I still w ant to hang around his shoulders and give him a light kiss there just to make him I am there right beside him and he can’t take his mind off from me even if he is trying to forget me for a single second.
I want to share the laughing with him. I want to cry on his shoulder. I want to see him light up with delight at the joy of me changed to a night dress and putting cream on my face and arms and he is impatiently waiting for me in bed..I want to see the pride in his eyes which our babies bring him, and I want to share a little of the weariness and frustration that come along with the job of parenting too.
I want him. Plain and simple.
I don’t want to have to wait another second longer. But I will. Because its only a soulful waiting is how I love him right now.
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