Hi

Much better now.am out with baba for a his lawyers appt.
Will be here for the next cpl of hours..
Parle phone koro..jodi options hoy..
Feeling horribly down and lonely n v v lost and deeply scared somwhere..
Mone hochhe kothay akta dube jachhi..
Jar kono tol nei..
Kalke ratre khub bhoyer bhoyer ajob sopno dekhechi..
Akdom lost lagche
love..
Take care

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I die on you

Jaanu Buri amar, utechish? Peter batha ta ektu komeche? Crapms ta ki ektu holeo kom? Na ki bereche?
Ami train e ekhono... Toke pagoler moto miss korchi... Tor koler modhe matha guje suye thakte eecha korche... Vishon, tor peter modhe mukh guje, tor gondho nite nite, mathay tor anguler bili khete khete... Aram pete khub eecha korche...

I'm missing you like anything... Love you so very much... Toke dekhbar jonno monta chotfot korche... Toke khujte khujte chokh duto batha hoye geyeche....

I love you... I want to spend days and nights with you, in your arms, wrapping your beautiful body, in your warmth...

Hi

Idaning to amar anek lengthy periods hoy..ajo bari fire mostly for the
journey thru almost fields...(gram er dike rasta bolte kichu nei)
dekhi the exhaustion has led to heavy bleeding with huge cramps..
Fever cramps lonliness plus the fact we r nowhere accessible to each
other is really brutal and killing..
Akta khub khoto bikhhto moner obosthay shute jabo..
Majhe JS drawer theke tomar dewa se brush wala eraser ta bar koreche,,
and amar sathe ota nebar jonyo jhogra koreche..
Or boktobyo ota Santa Cl or jonyo eneche..XMAS gift..so its
hers..while i hoard it..

I was thiniking that u are also like the surprise elemet of love in my
life like Santa..who comes with bagfull of gift for me called life at
times very rare defines my life...my eyes glitter and sparkle my lips
lit up in smile i feel my natural self and then he vanishes in thin
air leaving me behind in a black pithole of frustration lifelessness
and neverending undefined waitng for another chance of relive my
life..

Take care
just bhalo lagche naa..suye porchi..aktoo baad
love

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Way Back..

Anek jor eseche raastay...atota rastar dhokole ba season change
hoyto..ba whatever,,not really in R&D moe for RCA of fever..
kicchhu bhalo lagche naa.
Sob kichu vague lagche..
Every day is like more n more intriguing..whether by time we are being
pulled apart more or drawn together none of us knows...
Khub kosto hochhe re..mon ta khun khub beshi lonely r udasin laagche..
FM e "hoyto tomari jonyo hoyechi preme j bonyo" gaan ta hochhilo..
Konodino parle lyrics gulo abar shune dekho..
Amar aktoo raag hoyeche tomar opor..raag naa abhiman mite be better word..

Ami esechi akdin barate tumi khushi hoyecho...abar tumi gechile trip e
ami khusi hoyechi..
Jak o ektoo bairer alo batash pelo eibhebe..ghorer dom bondhyo kora
poristithi theke..
Wow..
Amader nijeder trip konodino habe kina jana nei..tai hoyto eirom
respective family family oriented trip s e..we have to be discreetely
happy..or perhaps V UNHAPPY which we are scared to share incase the
unattanded burns and cuts and wounds open up and we are not able to
sustain!!!

Tumi Honey Galaxy te jabe shune one component of me is already posted
there..but remaining part is v v lonely apprehensive scared and
mutiliated coz nothing is in our control...the string is in the hands
of a mysterious lady or lord and we are dancing to tunes like a
puppet..and our love intensifying every day without any hope of
togetherness and certainity!!!!
Love you...just take care
matha ta fete jachhee...
Asombhob jontrona korche..thik hobar noi apatoto ami jani,,

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Love

Akhon jor anek kom...but aj beriyechi..sokal bala..jor ache alpo...but
managable..
It was a sudden decission...
Anita r bari sundarban debipur jogodhhatri pujo hoy..okhane
Just parchilam na ar orom bhabe thakte domchepe and turse fight every
moment..nervous breakdown er moto state praay..

JS khub excited gram dekbe bole..
will come back tonight..
Just let me know when u r back...n if we can meet somehow tomorrow
even if for 5 Mins

just love u...dont know how much

ps. Neither am enjoying the journey nor into it..am lost in u..
Neither u r near me nor that i can tak to u...but feeling horribly
lonely n guilty..lonely i understand but guilty..why..
I dont know?
Tell me do u feel the same?give me ur hands ...n tell me
do u feel the fire burning?
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Jaan

Jor eseche khub aaj...anek koste office korechi...from 8.30 till
6.30...praay tolte tolte bari firechi...ekhane to military school er
moto..just 5 days sick leave..
Akdom bhalo lagchenaa...
Power to withstand ta breakdown korche slowly..while on missing u so intensely..

Kalke boro kore blog korbo...
Tumi kokhon pouchabe?eshe janio.
If possbl will try to call
there are so many endless discussions with you..
Sudhu kotha r due clear korte hoyto 10 days kete jabe...onyo sob to cherei dao..

Love you...love you so much..

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Miss You

Khub miss korchi re toke.. am just not able to sustain this separation anymore..
Feeling v v helpless and fragile.. akta toka marlei churchur kore sob kichu bhenge chure guro guro hoye jabe..I will simply crumble into pieces..

Erom bhabe bor k chere thaka sotti sombhob? and when I know I have the world's best husband tailor made manufactured ONLY for me...with all my detailed specifications..so very perfect and well made that to meet Customer's delight God missed the deadline of delivery..but he was ecstatically happy and marveled at his own creation..

Love You so much...khub kosto hochhe khub khub beshi...thakte parchi naa..
blog e sotti sotti likhteo parchinaa..j kotokhani kosto hochhe...We have crossed that phase when you used to blog our feelings..

akhon ami dekhechi phone , blog ba sms e aar feelings narrate korte parina amra..coz we miss each other too much, too intrinsically..
virtually miss you bolle aro beshi kosto bere jay...sob kichu bhenge buker opor achre porte ichha kore..

buker modehye mishe giye "khub khub bhalobashi tomay" bolte na para obdi mone hoy jol khaini saradin!!!
Just Take Care

Jaaan

I cant bear one more week w/o seeing you...ami janinaa..things are
moving out of control..
Just think if u can manage something..
I dont know how what when..
I have to fly to HYD and work from there from Monday to Friday...
No is not an option here...already said to delay it by one week or
make ot bangalore..

To which the answer is NO from them..
Probly next to next week or early Dec I will be in BLR for some
days..again..but this week is HYD..
the SAP lead is going to spain next Friday for 2 wks and wants to work
being colocated at Hyd for the next week and then again he would be
back in BLR nov end and would want me to go there..

Check with your end if you can work from HYD next week.. Even if personally..
Just in case if at all possible... Or we can travel overnight to BLR
HYD next week..

Whatever it is...i cant spend one more week w/o seeing you..already
dead here in seoaration...cant take it any further..

Plz do something..am not able to think..
I totally fall back on you...
Just ar nite parchinaa

love you so v much...just dying every moment

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Jaanu buri

please, e vabe bolo na... I was not busy and immerse in phone call, I was trying to create a pretext about the call from accenture where using that isolation, I can talk to you...

I was also dying to call you, but failed... and now you know the reason...

Love you so very much....

Take care....

Hi

Waited for your call for a long long time...and also called up 4-5
times in a hurry as i was running out of time..
u were so busy and immersed on the other call..

Anyway take care..i will be putting this off at the verge when i would
not be able to rcv it anymore..you can call me in the other number for
a min just to let me know u are fine..
love

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Good morning love

Worried like anything...just dying in tension...about you..
Are u ok?plz update a line...
Am really not able to do anything not even able to breathe without
knowing how you are..
Plz drop a line
love you so so so very much
take care sona
my buddhu baby singh

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Jaaan

How r you?am no good...in an awfull state of mind...entire day talked
to you alone..numerous threads of discussion...some of which i got
answers when i spoke to myself in your voice n some remained untold..
Just dying to talk to you when my mind is far from being agitated
actually in turbulence of emotions...so many array of thoughts some
important some very trivial but to me so much worth of sharing with
you.....dying to share with you but not able to force myself n update
in blog...
Hope u had a managbly better day..
Take care
love you so so very much..
Good nite

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Insights

1. That was neither fever nor shivering..
I have faced this before not once but several times when i miss you
too intensely the mind knows i can be nowhere near you but heart n
body being dumb fails to contemplate the fact and manifests its
helpless frustrations in this format....i might be wrong but amar erom
hoyeche...3/4 times...

2. Am not worrying just dying... Worry kore kichu korte parbo
ki?nothing...u are in safe hands and custody of your family..
Neither can i carry you nor can i worry..so simply dying inside..

3.they are predictable ppl..but not only predoctable something beyond..
This is called "porecho joboner haate ..khana khete habe sathe"
syndrome.. They will not give you any space just that..

U can perhaps relate aage aage tumi bolte par anek anek somoy on
smaller pretexts or ma er bari giye thakto....but akhon ar ak din o
jabe naa..
One reason is in their absence we might communicate..
But also there is a deeper reason which is they know even if we to do
not communicate we spend better time being alone left to solitude n
non intereference..
Which is impossible for them to acknowledge that their companionship
is is no more desired even if we are individually alone..
And thats why they will never give that space to us...
Simply ghare chepe bose thakbe... Till you cant move ur head and
suffer from tremendous neck pain bearing the double weight...

Take care love

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Baby, I'm good

Baby, sorry sokale call korte parini... amar sorir ta ektu kharap chilo, tai uthte parini sobar aage... Tumi please chinta koro na, temon kichu e na... Kal rat 1 tay suyechi.... Hotath dekhi majhrate vishon vishon kapchi, duto combol neye o.... Maa pashe suyechilo, amar kapuni te maa er ghum venge geyechilo, tar por aro duto lep diye amay chepe chilo, tarpor aste aste ghumeye porechilam... Asole oi anti biotic tar effec e khub weak hoye geyechi mone hoy....

Ami address ta Vishwa k mail kore deyechilam E5 theke....

Ami jantam, people will invariably do this... NOJORBONDI... Sob e predictable... They are all very general and predictable people... Charo.. Valo lagche na..

You just take care... Love you so very much...

Love

Ajke mon ta khub beshi udash hoye ache..something beyond being sad..
blog e likhte ichha korche naa..kichui details e..may be effect of hormones..
Tomar address wala mail ta ami akhono paini..pore somoy pele ok directly pathiye dio or else let me know by sms when you send it to me..I will communicate to Vishwa..whichever possible and convenient for you..

Things are getting more and more and more constricted with every passing day..
My timings at new place of joining is from 8:30 till 6:30.. and people have already adjusted their own office schedules according to mine..one week in advance....
Ami sotti bomi kore felechi..hotat kore..eta jene..
Things are not difefrent ..they are all expected even you told me that and we discussed it.. Tao bomi hoye gache..really dont know what exactly went wrong hearing the info!!

Pet byatha aj kal puro period ei kome na.. Its a contunious phase now..
Joto khon Tyelenol er effect thake totokhon akta trance state maintained hoy and then again the intensity and reality of the pain bites..like all and any other traumas of life..

Blood report e Haemoglobin chara onyo kichu thik thak ache..
HG count ta kichu ta kom.

Ami hoyto aj saradin blog korte parbo na ppl have taken leave to spend time at home as if kalke theke ami bhoyanok busy hoye porbo ar baritei firbo naa..Life will change upside down..
serom akta gesture e..
tumi address ta pathale (amake ba Vishwa k) amay akbar janiye dio..

Love You Take Care.. Misssing you every moment and sub moments...
Wish you a managably better day!!!

Good Night

Hi Jaanu Buri,

CA keno, tumi j khane bolbe ami chokh bondho kore jete raji aachi....

Amay Viswa call korechilo aaj, tumi ok address ta diye dio... amar purono barir address ta dio....

Ami amar address ta mail kore dichi tomay tomar mail ID te... tumi ok deye dio...

Amar oi "Ami vebechi tumio o Vacation e" bapar ta eksathe khub anondo o diyeche r montao kharap koriye deyeche, why? You know both the reasons....

Ami thik aachi, tumi chinta koro na... just love me and wish that I can take you in my arms as soon as possible...

Love you so very much... Kal sokale call korbar chesta korbo tomay, SS ta songe rekho...

Ekhon pet batha ta kemoon? komeche ektu? Blood report gulo ki bolche....

Love you jaan, Missing you .... pagol er moto....

Good Nite

Love You take care
hopefully tomorrow would be a lil better and a little less painful day though the magnitude of solitude remains same...
the blogworld conference is from Nov 3-5 Los Angeles CA. Jabe?
Just Love You...Love You so so very much

Vishwa NIIT :)

Viswa Called up several times.. to know about your address and our contract paper..
It was a long story.. they did only sent my contract and yours was delayed..and I said either we will start working together else not...

So he was asking where to send your contract letter to me..
I was not sure which address you want to recv so I said I dont know his address..and he is on vacation..
Let him come back and I will discuss with him about the contract at length and then only I can send you the signed copies..To which he replied that "I thought you are also in vacation and I tersely said NO".. :)

Anyway after you are back we need to close this NIIT and if you get time you send them your address details or let me know which address you want your contract I will communicate to them accordingly..It will take about a week

No need to call taking pressure..I am just about ok DO NOT WORRY..
Am not well and down its true but that doesn't mean that I am weak and crumble :) You know that I am Even stronger when my husband is not around...

Love You
Take Care about you..am a lil concerned about your health and state of mind..after the accident trauma...

Baby I love you

Baby, you just don't worry about me... I'm managing myself some how... Yes, the accident was very unfortunate... And her condition was horrifying...

Bad luck and me is synonymous... Only person who can make me happy and make me feel protected- is YOU....

Waiting and counting time to see you again... Feeling very depressed... You are suffering in pain there and I'm not even able to talk to you...

Love you so very much... You take care...

Call

Am all by myself..parle akbar phone koro..iff (if and only if possible) feeling very worried..dont know why though.e.
boudi k to ami chinio naa..but still feeling very very worse.
khubii kharap lagche..
ki kore holo accident ta?
You please take care and come back safe..feeling horribly down..
and mssing you intensely..
Love You so very much..feeling like am waiting for you like 14 long yrs of banobas..

very worried

tomar kopale ki shanti nei kothao giye akfotao?
Every moment something or the other horridest scary incidents following you
everywhere wherever you go

amar akdom bhalo lagche naa..
Kichu bolar o to nei...
Ami thik achi..jerom thaki ei 5 or 6 days tomay chara ar ki..
Ajkal to notun upodrob thikthak clear hoyna kichu and 3 4 days cramps thake..
Khub monta kharap hoye ache khobor ta shune..
U just stay safe v v safe..come back safe to kol...
Mone hochhe bairer places suit korche naa..
Just being superstitious..and helpless..

Somehow manage things gritting teeth n be back..
Love you so so so very muuch and worried like hell..

Good morning shona

Good morning jaan... Kemon aachish tui? Sorir ta ki ektu thik hoyeche? Ekhon ki ektu valo lagche?

Amar sorir ekhon thik aache... But ekhaner khobor valo na... Kal sara din hospital e chilam... Boudir paye legeche... Serious injury... Hatu theke khabla mere mangsho uthe geyeche, 8 ta selai poreche ... Ami r dada sara din ei neyei dourechi... Tourist place, tao abar Sunday, kichui pawa jay na...

Anyway charo...

You take care... Love you so very much...

Good Night

Good night jaanu..
Suye porchi...khub cramps hochhe and intense pain...pet theke pa obdi
abosh abosh lagche,,,,

how are you?how was today?did you feel a lil better?matha r wound ta
thik ache?take care
love you so very much..
Love you for ever n ever
yours only

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