Updates??

what do you mean by sob kichu thik ache??
Thik nei..ki thik ache na ache ami janinaa ..ami thik nei,,just nei..
Am tired of dying everyday.. cats and dogs jhogra hoyeche,,,prochondoo..
Am simply fatigued and weary.. If only I could get some peace somewhere..

We were (mostly he was) quarreling for long long times..saying so many things.
Was telling me j ami koto niche gechi .coming from a good family etc ..
wagera wagera..breaking the family home and ruining so many lifes..including yours'..
Was telling n number of times j tumi amay several times refuse koro..reject koro..tao ami kano somostyo self esteem khuiye tomar pechone pore thaki..
I have upfront told him..that ami ok chara bachte parina.. tai ok phone kori..
and it doesnt count to me what is feelings for me..
I get immense amount of peace in him..in confiding in him..and I cant live without communicating with him

And can never survive that day..when I would know I will never ever get to communicate with him..

Things went out of proportion...we fought like anything ja hoy..
amar details dite bhalo lagchee naa
feeling extremely down..
more so as probability of meeting you tomorrow becoming more and more bleak ..feeling too caged too indignant..

I might not be able to reach Salt Lake tomorrow..shedding all off.but I need to meet you to survive..
I can go to Mom's place 8B beauty parlor anywhere..tell me a place and meet you..during the morning 9 AM??
If you can make some options...
ami jani parbe naa.. You also are caged have no EXCUSES to come out just like that..
We cant go out somewhere JUST LIKE THAT>> WE NEED EXCUSE to LIVE our LIFE even if its for 10 mins..

kalke habe naa porshu habe naa.. tarpor din o hoyto habe naa (Thursdays being nightmares at present) Friday tumi thakbe naa till next Friday..jobe firbe tarpor weekend tarpor next Monday dakha holeo hote paree..coz we will again take the shade of our Office Umbrella ...


Perhaps need to drink tonight to keep me knocked off..
Talk to you tomorrrow..

Love you so so very much...beyond everything..
Not asking how is your wound.. I dare not ask YOU!!!


P.S>> I have thought about deeply and I am sure ELOPING is the ONLY OPTION if at all else we need to die every moment ..roasted in bonfire alive!!!!